Wednesday, January 30, 2008
i do this from time to timewhere i can never wake from a bad dreami do this from time to timewhere i can never say the things i meani do this from time to timewhere i like to watch you as you sleepi do this from time to timewhere i like to think of you and me
lights off, pyjamas on
5:08 PM
Monday, January 21, 2008
another night out alone where the only people still awake go bump in the night. so much for finding company to have quality conversation. what happened to the days of melbourne where i got always count on someone to follow me down to the kungfu courtyard for a toke (jimmy, kev or dan), or go grab a coffee (weian or adriel).
still, the last few days have been a f***ing welcome relief to the dreariness that so often plagues the neighbourhood of late. saturday, was in fact, a top-notch day, one of the best i've had in years.
before i divulge the juicy goss from last night, thursday was not a bad day itself. i met yuwei cause we were on a shopping mission and we were pretty successful. we also ate like pigs and ended up incapable of walking competently. blame it on the two carl's jr meals, as well as the yami yoghurt which i so greedily decided to get, only to regret 3 scoops after.
friday was decent too, met nigey boey for the best meepok in singapore (he claims) before going back to trash his ass at winning11. we then went jalan besar stadium cause he had to run errands for his sister and i went to FAS to collect my singapore jersey for this season haha only boey knows i play for singapore.
so saturday was a fab day. went down to costa sands in the afternoon to help azad prepare for joan's birthday surprise. admittedly, the barbeque took a little too long for my expertise to be able to tolerate but blushes aside, the fire eventually started.
i then took off to porta-porta for hoon and kevin's birthday dinner which was good for the sheer fact that it was a good catching up session with people we see often, and some we hardly get to see. first time seeing melbourne people like wenjin in singapore, and of course catching up with yuji and yuda again was always good, not to forget grilling hoon about his chalet escapades haha.
after that, back to costa sands for more frivolous activity. these include drinking bacardi by the bottle, spraying some sticky shit on azad and joan, spraying whipped cream after i ran out of sticky shit, getting chased by azad, getting tshirt torn by azad, getting hugged by azad who had cake on his face, etc etc.
one of the best was when someone rubbed chilli sauce in azad's eye. at first before it burned, he still had the composure to attempt to scold the fella, but within a few seconds only his screams of agony could be heard haha. i was standing with owen, nick and isaku when that happened and it was seriously so damn funny. add that to numerous jokes we cracked at owen's expense. the best two being "owen take of your vest" and "dont worry you won't get disqualified for that" haha.
also had my first attempt at a business venture, forming a satay and grill stall with joan and jeremy. "BEST in singapore, and JB, some say batam but CONSPERM phuket!! because phuket no sell satay!" hahaha.
azad was so gone that he fell asleep and didnt even say bye to me. thankfully joan and xue were nice enough to walk me to the taxi stand cause the pathway was really dark and scary :(
ok it was nice to not be emo for a change. even though i just got off the phone again at this hour. but recapping the fun i had yesterday, why let so much fun go to waste and ruin the night just cause of one minor phone call.
i persist. gabriel out.
lights off, pyjamas on
2:11 AM
Wednesday, January 16, 2008
i'm back, and although anyone who has anything better to do hasnt been here for the longest time, i am nonetheless going to blog plainly i have an overwhelming need to rant.
its almost 2am on this wednesday morning, and altho i am down with the flu and should be asleep, the sandpaper in my throat is quite unbearable, in addition to the things said in the very last phone call echoing around in my head. the last few nights have been pretty cold for singapore standards and as i wait to see if you're going to call back, waves of nostalgia are crashing down again.
maybe it's the fact that using my new laptop is reminiscent of the times where i started using a new laptop in anticipation of the varying school terms starting in melbourne. maybe it's just plainly for the fact that the last time i used my laptop on a desk, it was in burwood 2004; what memories that place holds. the baking and the cooking, the lunches spent eating red rooster, and the endless night skies with the stars all bright.
falling asleep alone has never before felt more haunting. even if not for the physicality of it, just having someone to talk to on the phone right to the brink where you both yawn and call it quits for the night. there's a song somewhere in this post waiting to be discovered. i havent had the inspiration or energy to write a song in months, so why bother looking.
there's you, you and you. out of the three of you, i hate one of you. you'll be surprised which one it actually is.
the weeks have flown by without a sense of remorse. soon all the melbourne people will leave singapore to start the new term. all my good friends and along with them, this impending return to melbourne probably takes away every last breath of hope.
still i look forward to the weekends. it starts as early as friday evening where yuwei and hoon will come over for a night of gaming. we always propose to call it an early night but when the last game of winning11 is at 3 in the morning, and we have to wake up at six for football, you know the discipline is sorely lacking. football saturdays are always fun even though the last few weeks have been only 4-on-4. of course our hearts are missing the stars that have graced the fields once in the past, only to never return again. people like ali, sukiman, dzul and the gracious jack lim (inside joke hee).
whilst vibrant youngsters spent the weekends partying their guts out, i prefer to have a quiet night in watching football. it's that unadventurous bit in me which hates the nightlife that has relegated me to where i am right now, but then again if it's not spoilt you dont change it.
emo-ness truly knows no bounds. once again the only people i can talk to are the ghouls and the spirits, with the exception of that insomniac on msn i havent spoken to in years. "why bother about gab?" the rest cry, their beauty sleep or private phone calls so much more important. still, we adapt and we survive. it's that simple. darwin's theory of evolution. we stumble, we struggle, we learn, we move on.
the hour is late and i'm still awake, just like the previous 80 nights (count if you think i'm kidding). nonetheless, we evolve. i may have struggled and i might still not be able to sleep on my own accord, but i learn. this has to be the most disjointed post ever, and it's never made more sense to me.
i smell my tshirt you used to sleep in, the one that still smells of you. i listen to the songs we used to fall asleep to. i hug scooby for abit. i am now ready to sleep. we stumble, we struggle, we learn, i hope i move on. it's that simple. darwin's theory of evolution.
lights off, pyjamas on
1:43 AM
