Tuesday, October 26, 2010
back in singapore, after a semi-whirlwind getaway in bali. photos will be up on facebook soon (meaning once i find the usb cable haha).
today's entry will, however, be sort of a blast from the past. it all stemmed from listening to an old song by yellowcard, entitled
how i go. it's basically a song from a dying father to his son, telling him that though they may not have agreed on many things in the past, every action he ever made was basically made with the best intentions for the son in his heart. it was inspired by the movie
big fish by tim burton. which brought back memories because unless i'm sorely mistaken, it was the first movie i ever watched in melbourne back in 2004.
i remember when i first started out studying in trinity, it wasn't that easy making friends. as everyone knows, i ain't the most outgoing person who can interact spontaneously. as such, for the first few weeks there, i pretty much hung out with weian everyday. there was one night we had his and dan's RJ friend nicole over to our place where we sorta cooked dinner and chilled the night away. i think a few days later, the three of us singaporeans, caught up in a strange foreign land, decided to go catch a movie together.
you know how when people say, i can still remember what happened like it was just yesterday. more often than not, it's just a saying. this time though, i mean it. back in the day, we had no hoyts at melbourne central to catch a movie. heck, the melbourne central you see today was still in the works. and crown wasn't much of an option because, well i think because back in february/march of 2004, me and an hadn't even stepped foot into crown.
instead, we had lygon street. something about lygon street still takes my breath away just thinking about it. especially when we used to have lessons in the small language building tucked behind two quaint eateries. popping out of the building upon finishing class to the wafts in the air of homemade pappardelle and parmiggiano reggiano just didn't quite feel like school.
and at lygon street, we have cinema nova. i've never been one for arthouse flicks and you know, that whole vibe. i wouldn't even classify nova as one of those places. but it was a small cosy little theatre. i remember thoroughly enjoying the show, before heading down to the bookstore below and buying the novel immediately to read it. instead of the giant corporate identity that is borders, i bought my novel at joe's bookstore, a small stall right at its entrance.
i guess i particularly felt the need to write this all down now is because i went through my old 2004 archives and i don't seem to have made any mention of this. which is all the more upsetting because this was a pretty significant moment of my time there. i don't quite know how to explain why i feel so, but when thinking about a particular recollection overwhelms you, it has to mean something doesn't it.
and then i realised that 2004 was full of memories i didn't bother to record down. maybe at the young age of 16/17, i was caught up in other less important matters. maybe, these things that mean alot of me right now just didn't mean that much back then.
i remember 2004 was the first time ever i held a girl's hand. i can't remember why we were out late, but i was walking her home. autumn had set in, and coming from a tropical climate, it was slight chilly. i must have been shivering or chattering like a wimp because she asked if i was cold. i wisely replied why don't you feel my hand. she took my hand and said it was pretty damn cold. i remember i didn't let go, all the way to her doorstep.
2004 was filled with a boxful of brilliant memories. it probably helped that melbourne, especially the trinity grounds were so damn beautiful. being away for the first time in your life, you have that sense of anticipation where you don't quite know whether you're more afraid or excited. that feeling of anticipation, in my opinion, is the epitome of youth. not knowing much at all, but knowing you definitely want to find out more. i guess as we get older, our outlook on the world generally gets bleaker. i actually think when we bemoan the passing of our youth, what we miss the most is our optimism, the belief that you can take on all comers.
whilst we can take many fond memories from our past, we can also take lessons from the missed opportunities and the wrong turns. watching the video montage at sant & stovany's wedding on saturday was interesting because as it turns out, they met at trinity orientation camp, an event i missed not because i was unwell or busy, but quite frankly because i just didn't feel like it. i didn't wanna go to a camp full of strangers for three days, i didn't wanna have to mingle and potentially embarass myself in a compromising situation (as they like to make you do in orientation camps). i was homesick and i didn't wanna be in a place where i had to pretend otherwise, like i was actually having fun. so i met the camp advisor and i told her i was sick.
she bought it, and today i sit hear wondering if my life in trinity, or even as a whole, would/could have been any different if i had sucked it in, and went for that damn orientation camp. whenever my friends come to me for advice, the one thing i always tell them is that it's better to regret something that you did, then something that you didn't. thus, the lesson learnt here, which i promise to always do henceforth, is to take life by the scruff of its neck. no more being passive and hoping something drops for the sky, cause that don't happen. put yourself out there, even make a fool of yourself, if only so that you can say, "damn i did that", rather than, "i wonder what would have happened if i did that".
i'm sure in a couple of days, or maybe months, when i'm in a different frame of mind, i'll find a strong case to argue otherwise. for now though, with
how i go playing in the background, as these memories from this particular year flood through me with torrents of nostalgia and regret, and even content, i don't think i can say otherwise. 2004, was pretty much, the best year of my life.
---
i could tell you the wildest of talesmy friend, the giant, and travelling salestell you all the times that i failedthe years all behind me, the stories exhaledand i'm drying out, crying outthis isn't how i goi could tell you a man not so tallwho said life's a circus and so we are smalltell you of a girl that i sawi froze in the moment and she changed it alland i'm drying out, crying outthis isn't how i gohurry now, lay me downand watch these waters flowson i am not everything you thought that i would bebut every story i have told is part of meyou keep the air in my lungsfloating along as a melody comesand my heart beats like timpani drumskeeping the time while a symphony strumsand i'm drying out, crying outthis isn't how i gohurry now, lay me downand watch these waters flowson i am not everything you thought that i would bebut every story i have told is part of meson i leave you now but there is so much more to doand every story i have told is part of you
lights off, pyjamas on
12:49 AM
Sunday, October 24, 2010
so, here's my follow-up since i attempted to revive this blog a couple of weeks ago, altho in truth, this is really the first free time i've managed to get since.
i am officially writing this from bali right now, which i've been here since friday night. we touched down in the evening and proceeded straight to our hotel, then for dinner at this place which i can pronounce but can't quite spell. no worries though, i will soon get the name and it will be up with the photos on facebook!
dinner was a decent meal with dan, wanyong & nicky, altho the highlight was definitely when sant and ian came to find us after. i haven't seen sant in over a year probably, and ian, even longer. so it was good to see my old melbourne buddies/housemates once again.
saturday was an overly-hectic day. dan and i woke up nice and early around 7am and decided to be adventurous and have street food for breakfast. we walked abit before settling on a stall with a very quaint outpost for fast consumption of food. there were probably about four stools and one table only. we had
nasi campur, which i was rather pleased with, altho our meal cost us signficantly more than what street food normally does. this was definitely due to dan ordering a plate of noodles as his staple instead of the normal
nasi kuning, especially when the noodles were a side dish. just imagine ordering
beef rendang as your staple, it figures really.
after which, we returned to our hotel and upon discovering we have free breakfast, we decided to have a second breakfast; the spread being pretty alright. we then got changed and headed down to ayana resort, jimbaran for sant's wedding ceremony.
to say it was eventful would be putting it plainly. it started raining so they had to shift the outdoor ceremony to an indoor area, meaning a slight delay. then we weren't promptly informed when the shift had been made, so we arrived rather late for the ceremony, and were greeted with glares by the congregation, when it wasn't really our fault! still, the ceremony was beautiful, and i would be lying if i said i didn't slightly tear when sant and stovany together went to their respectful parents and knelt down and received their blessings as an official married couple.
i was then introduced to sant's parents and brother, and they are all brilliant people. exactly like sant, except much less crazy. or at least, that's the first impression ha. the newlyweds proceeded for their photo-taking session by the cliff, which was pretty memorable considering there were probably more photographers than guests!
the rest of the day, we left our stuff at sant's villa, and then went to make full use of the ayana facilities. i must stress that the resort is really gorgeous, the facilities awesome, and the service is top-notch. i guess you really pay for what you get. we had a splendid lunch at one of the restaurants,
nasi goreng kampung and satay, being my choice of meal. dan and i then had a few rounds of pool by the pool, before we went for a dip.
the wedding dinner itself was pretty awesome. the food was nice, the entertainment was engaging, and sitting in a table with all the old melbourne people, especially some of my closest friends (albeit with some i hate too LOL), meant a good evening full of catching up and old jokes. the band they had was really professional (meaning FABULOUS), and i'm no expert in dance music, but i thought the DJ they hired was awesome. saturday was pretty tiring so i crashed when i got home.
today, we got up slightly later, dan, wanyong and i went for the buffet breakfast at our hotel. banana pancakes topped the list, altho i enjoyed the fish sausages which i've never seen in my life! basically tasted like a non-spicy
otah i guess. after which, we decided that it would be a day of lazing around. so after turning on starworld and catching three back-to-back episodes of
how i met your mother, i went down to the pool and chilled for a few hours. it was a thoroughly refreshing process. i just laid there and listened to my ipod, when it got too hot, i jumped into the pool. when i got too wrinkly, i came back up and napped for abit. when it got too hot again, i jumped in once more. so on and so forth. ian and adhi dropped by on their way out to lunch and we chatted for abit.
after seeing adhi off at four pm and ian off at five, dan, wanyong and i proceeded to this beachside seafood joint which we had originally wanted to go to on the first night but it was closed. it was quite breathtaking. you walk into the restaurant and there are containers full of fresh seafood, which you literally point out and choose for yourself. then you walk past the indoor area and straight onto soft golden sand, before settling at a wooden table right at the brink where the tides reach. as the lobsters and fish and prawns and clams hit your table one by one, the sun slowly sets, leaving the sky with a quite magnificent reddish-blue glow. all this while sipping a pina colada, before downing the greasy, charred, delicious seafood with a couple glasses of
bir bintang.
after which, we arrive at this point. i am leaving back to singapore tomorrow, and i will thoroughly miss this place. i can't say i'm totally comfortable in a place like this, which i find chaotic, but strangely enough, through the chaos the locals here seem to find some order, none more apparent than in the rush hour traffic which is maddening yet very fluent. i look forward to more coming back here in the future, as well as the influx of weddings that will surely come as our generation slowly reaches the marrying-age.
one thing remains constant though. where this is good company, there is good fun. that is why i'm pretty damn sure i had a hell of a time this weekend. gabriel out!
lights off, pyjamas on
11:23 PM
Monday, October 11, 2010
alright, so amazingly, i haven't properly blogged in over a year, which is honestly quite dreadful. a quick recap of the last... sixteen(??) months is in order.
first and foremost, recruit gabriel tan, which became private, lance corporal and then corporal (narrowly missing out on sergeant because i do not take ippt HA) has officially ORD-ed from national service. gosh it's been a long time but like all things, once it's over you sorta get the feeling it actually flew by. one fine day i've probably gonna give NS a proper recap, going through how it has impacted me and all the interesting people i've met. but not for now.
since then, i have been really busy being a bum haha. i know i should really be starting work soon but i really do not want to go straight into a position where i will be bound to a desk 24/7. unfortunately, i don't think the folks are too keen on me working odd jobs at present, which is actually where i really see myself at right now. thankfully, they haven't started nagging at me to get out of the house, probably cause i've been devoting tonnes of my time working towards my driving licence, which i think they rate as high priority.
something good that's happened in the last month, the band's been getting a number of gigs! well, mostly just one friday slot for the last three weeks, altho i did a no-show for the second week cause i was awfully sick. we just finished our three week stint at KR50 @ NUS this past friday, but the management gave us another slot the next night at NV50 @ NTU, which was also a paying gig so that was pretty awesome. we did two sets collaborating with azad and fahyik's hall band member, aisyah, and she's a brilliant singer. overall, i actually think the gigs went pretty well. which is something coming from me cause i normally rate our shows average. lots of things go wrong, ranging from song choices to not being able to perform on the actual show. but i think we've matured a lot as a band, and we really did sound decent. hopefully, we'll have more chances to improve and showcase our wares.
another great thing to happen, after five years of barracking for collingwood since the fateful, life-changing day in february 2004 when jane garton wrote "collingwood is the best football club in the world" on the whiteboard at trinity, i have witnessed the magpies win the 2010 premiership. i can't imagine what it's like for the older supporters who have had to wait 20 years to break the drought since the last victory in 1990. once again, writing about sport is not something i particularly do because i feel it alienates the non-sport fanatic crowd. so i will just leave it as, 2nd october 2010, was quite an amazing day. and not just cause it was my birthday too!
so i didn't even sign off on 2009 here, and already we're nearing the end of 2010. while i don't think i'm quite ready to appraise this year, here's a couple of things i hope to complete by year-end, or at least within the first two months of 2011.
1) pass my driving and start taking pa's cars out for a spin
2) decide what i want to do in the near future and initiate plans to carry them out
3) petition fanatically to all the pubs around singapore for more gigs
there's a pretty decent list, if i may say so myself. not to many things to ensure that it remains accomplish-able, but also having some pretty significant milestones to strive towards.
on top of that all, i vow to revive this ailing blog. like i said before, the sole purpose of this page is not to voice my opinion and all matters worldly, but basically as a journal, so that years down the road, i can look back and reminisce and all that has taken place. it's served its purpose thus far since its inception in 2004, so why stop now?
here's to more frequent: gabriel out!
lights off, pyjamas on
1:13 AM
